The Legend of Zelda Part 3

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!! THIS POST IS RIPE WITH SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The first true "Zelda" game on the list (my opinion).

14. The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass (Nintendo DS 2007)

Phantom Hourglass was the first Zelda game to be released on the Nintendo DS, making it the first Zelda game to utilize touch controls.  The game utilizes cell-shaded style graphics to great effect, although honestly I feel as though there are certain areas where it should look a bit more polished.  

The player, for the first time in the Zelda series, does not use a control stick to control Link.  Instead, the player moves the stylus across the screen to move Link in a particular direction.  Every command in the game utilizes unique touch screen controls, from deciding where to place bombs to drawing pictures on the screen to open doors.

This image is a typical scene from the game.  Using the stylus the player could swipe to swing the sword, spin it to do a spin attack, do a moving forward spin to roll,  or (as you can see the boomerang is equipped) draw a path for the boomerang to fly.  I do very much enjoy a good deal of the touch controls in this game.  Despite my initial trepidation, I came to find that I actually really enjoyed the stylus controls.

Phantom Hourglass itself is a direct sequel to The Legend of Zelda the Wind Waker and had a lot of hype to live up to.  Set some time after the events of Windwaker, the scene opens with Link and Tetra in pursuit of a ghostly pirate ship.  Tetra goes aboard and disappears.  Link tries to follow but through a crazy turn of events ends up washed up on a beach.  Later, he is rescued by the fairy Ciela and an old man named Oshus.  These two become your main guides throughout the game offering advice and crucial information.  After first talking to Oshus, you learn that you have to enlist the serviced of a man named Linebeck.  Not only does he have a boat, but he can be found in the Temple of the Ocean King.

  As you first go through the temple, you will find that going in certain areas of the temple diminishes your health.  After you rescue Linebeck, you recover the Phantom Hourglass  from inside the temple and learn that you need to get the spirits of Courage, Wisdom, and Power in order to get more time in the Phantom Hourglass (more time in hourglass = time not getting hurt while inside the temple).  

As the player journeys through the game, Link will return to this temple after each area has been defeated, going further and further into the temple each time.  This game mechanic, while slightly interesting, gets relatively tedious after a while because each time you come back you have to do go through the earlier floors of the temple as well.  It's not a complete deal breaker, but it does slow the pacing of the game a little.

During the bulk of gameplay, the player has access to Linebeck's ship (the S.S. Linebeck).  Using the world map, the player draws a path for the boat to take (pictured on the upper portion of the screenshot), moves the switch to go, and then sets off across the ocean.  There are several islands that the player can visit, making the world appear to be very large at first.  However, after a few minutes of "driving" the boat around the ocean, you discover that drawing where you want to go is extremely difficult when it comes to precision.  Sometimes you will find that you have just overshot where you wanted to go, but found that turning the boat around and getting to where you wanted to go are kind of a pain in the ass; the boat would control so much better if it was a sailing ship (cough Wind Waker cough).

There are several features of the overworld map that I do enjoy very much.  As you can see, the person who drew the path for the boat was also able to mark on the map where he was supposed to be going, where some treasure was located, and mark off where he believes some treasure might be in the north.  This mechanic comes in handy during the temples and in fact, there are several sections where you actually have to draw on the map in order to continue.  Bring up the map is extremely easy as it normally sits on the top screen (the non-touch screen) and all you have to do to bring it down is push down on the d-pad.  I like how easy it is to use a tool that the developers clearly wanted to be used all the time.

I find the dungeons in this game to be very hit or miss with me.  The usage of each main item feels a bit lazy at times and yet innovative at others.  I do very much enjoy drawing the path that the boomerang goes but I also very much dislike how the bow and arrow in this game works .  You are supposed to be able to just tap and pull back on the bottom screen (much like drawing back an actual arrow).  I have found though that when you pull beyond the maximum length, it becomes difficult to aim with the precision accuracy sometimes required in this game.  It can also be very easy to waste arrows if you accidentally tap the bottom screen with the arrows equipped.  To this game's credit, I do find that the temples in the second half of the game are much better than the temples in the first half.  Maybe that sentiment speaks to this whole game though?  Despite the fact that this game has a pretty large number of collectibles (sea scrolls, treasure scrolls, a cool trading sequence, fish, gems, and customizable boat party), seven unique dungeons, and twenty islands to visit I somehow do not get that sense of adventure when I play this game.  I do not feel as connected to the characters or the narrative that the developers were trying to create.  Instead, I find myself a bit bored by the collectibles, despite the fact that they are very similar in nature to other Zelda games that I enjoy.

What is it then about this Zelda game that doesn't do it for me?  I think it really comes down to laziness on Nintendo's part.  I find the Temple of the Ocean King to be an idea gone wrong, I find most of the bosses to be mostly boring, I find the world itself to be pretty bland, and the characters themselves quite forgettable.  I also find the story itself to be quite forgettable and in fact, I had to look it up online despite having played the game twice before.

Despite the problems this game has, it does have several excellent bright spots.  I do very much enjoy most of the touch screen controls, the game is worth experiencing just to try them out in my opinion.  I enjoy searching for hidden treasure at sea, and I very much enjoy certain dungeons and bosses.

I particularly enjoy the boss of the final dungeon, Eox (A link to the battle if you want to see it).  His body takes up both the top and bottom screen and the battle itself is intense, making excellent use of the touch screen controls and several of the items the player gets during the game.  I enjoy the large number of enemies in the game, 58 different ones to be exact.  I also very much enjoy one or two of the characters very much.  Linebeck provides a great amount of comic relief, playing the loud mouthed but scared shitless anti-hero role.  I also enjoy any Zelda game has Beedle in it.  I don't really know why, but I am a sucker for that peddler of wares.  He can be in any video game for all I care, just give me more of him!  I also have to give some credit to Nintendo, they created a new major evil guy for this game, Bellum, that I actually enjoy quite a bit.  I really do hope we see more of him in the future.

Overall, Phantom Hourglass is a decent game that is definitely worth your time if you have never played it before, especially if you are a fan of the Zelda series.  Be warned though, parts of it will feel like a bit of a grind while parts of it will remind you why you like Zelda games so much.  Not at all a terrible game, but not even close to the top level Zelda games and certainly not good enough for the top ten.


Thanks for reading!  Can't wait to get to #13!

The Legend of Zelda Part 2

YOU HAVE HAD FAIR WARNING!!!!!!  RIPE WITH SPOILERS!!!!!!!

15. The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords (2002 Gameboy Advance)

The Legend of Zelda Four Swords is certainly the most unique Zelda game in the series, the only one that (originally) had no single player campaign.  In addition to that oddity, Four Swords (as you can see from the North American box art to the right) was released on a GBA cartridge that was advertised as, "A Link to the Past" AND a "new multiplayer experience."  This failure on Nintendo's part to adequately advertise their product resulted in many people never even playing Four Swords. Needing two people, two copies of the game, and a GBA link cable to play it is the original game's biggest downfall.  How often did at least two people, a link cable, and two copies of the game ever actually come together?  I'd wager it really wasn't that many.


The game begins inside the Shrine of the Four Sword (right).  Princess Zelda and Link have ventured to the shrine to check the seal that is keeping the evil Wind Mage Vaati at bay.  Unfortunately for them, over time, the seal was weakened and Vaati was able to escape; not before taking Zelda to be his bride though.  In the aftermath of the encounter, Link is instructed by some great fairies to remove the Four Sword and prove that he is capable of rescuing Zelda.  Upon removing the Four Sword, Link is split into Four Links and charged with saving Zelda and the World (Here's a link  to the 4 minute long intro if you are interested in seeing it)!

This Zelda game differs from all of the other Zelda games (except Four Swords Adventures for the Gamecube) in that it does not have a traditional overworld like Hyrule Field in Ocarina of Time or Clock Town/Termina Field in Majora's mask, etc.  Instead you get this:

As you can see, the overworld consists of five main areas: the Chamber of Insight (training area), the Sea of Trees, Talus Cave (ice cave), Death Mountain, and Vaati's Wind Palace.  You select an area from the overworld and venture forth together into each environment.  Upon arrival in the Chamber of Insight, this game ceases to be what many of us consider to be a "Zelda" game.  Considering there are 16 games in the series (soon to be 17), I think we can almost consider "Zelda" games to be their own genre.  This game, while not in an entirely terrible way, turns that "Zelda" convention upside down.

This chamber is meant to familiarize you with the games controls and new item system.  Instead of the traditional large item inventory that slowly increases in size and quality, you immediately have access to all of the items in the game.  Coupled with this, during gameplay, you will encounter the different items throughout each level (sitting on pedestals) and have the option of assigning one to A and one to B.  By using different items (only two per player at a time) you advance through each level until you eventually enter the room with the large floor button.  This button transports you to the Great Fairy who will judge whether or not you are awesome enough to save Princess Zelda.  I find that this system gets to be a bit awkward, especially when you leave the bombs on one pedestal and have to backtrack in order to get them again.

Besides the items, the Links are tasked with getting as many rupees in the level as possible.  The number of rupees you get is dependent on a pretty surprising number of factors: level completion time, number of times downed, how you kill enemies, hidden treasure chests found, etc. At the end of each level, there's a rupee podium where the Four Links are pitted against each other.  Honestly, this entire system feels very odd.  It certainly doesn't feel that much like a Zelda game which

I suppose isn't the worst thing in the world, but it does make the experience feel a little cheapened.  I also don't really understand why the Four Links are competing with each other and working together.  There are no extra rewards for finishing first and it doesn't affect the gameplay or the story at all.  That's another problem with this game, the story is completely non-existent apart from a few short cut scenes at the beginning and the end of the game.  There are no NPC's in the stages, no side quests, no real bonus areas, and honestly nothing that gives you that "I'm playing a Zelda game feeling."  Each level just feels like the same puzzles with a slight environmental twist.  To give the game a bit of credit, I do enjoy some of the sections that involve player coordination.  During gameplay, the links can team up to push objects and take on more difficult enemies.  One instance in particular is the "Hikkun" enemy (pictured below).  These enemies require coordinated sword swings and then coordinated grabs and pulls from the highly convenient handles on the Hikkun's head (eventually pulling it apart).  It's features like that that make it difficult for me to completely dislike this game.


I would say the shining feature of this game are the boss battles.  These battles are the only things that make this game feel like a Zelda game.  I won't spoil these battles for you but trust me when I say that the artwork and battle mechanics are a lot of fun.  Playing with several players makes the game either very fun or very frustrating, be prepared to yell at each other.

The final boss himself, Vaati, is by the far the best part of this game.  His desire to be evil for no reason really makes me enjoy his character quite a bit (and tell me he doesn't look cool).  The final battle features several different forms of Vaati, each offering their own challenge and own unique battle mechanics. (Link to the Final Battle if you want to see what it looks like).



This game was made amazingly better by Nintendo back in 2011 when they released the Four Swords Anniversary Edition on the 3DS.

 It featured an all new single player mode (desperately needed to actually be able to enjoy this game when you want to), three tiers of difficulty, and two new areas that feature stages different 2D Zelda games and an extremely difficult challenge area.  I find myself extremely conflicted over this game.  I can't say that I completely enjoy the experience, but I can't say that I hated it either.  If you truly enjoy the Zelda series, I'd recommend giving it a play through, but I doubt you will come back to it again that often in the future.  If you are lucky enough to have a 3DS, I really hope they rerelease it in the eshop soon, as it has been off of there for some time now.

Thanks so much for reading!  I wonder which game will come next!

The Legend of Zelda Part 1

YOU HAVE HAD FAIR WARNING!!!!!!!!!! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!!!!

Back in 2011, when the Legend of Zelda series turned 25 years old, I embarked on a quest to play every Legend of Zelda game.  I had owned every game in the series for quite some time, but had always been immensely distracted by my other gaming conquests.  I felt that the 25th Annieversary of the series was as good of a time as any to play them all and after a few years of reflection (and second play throughs of all the games) I have decided that now is the time to rank them.  I have put an immense amount of thought into this list over the past few years and hopefully it will spark some interesting conversation.

Ironically, I have to start this list with my least favorite game in the Zelda series:

16. The Adventure of Link (1987 Nintendo Entertainment System)

This is without a doubt the most controversial game in the Zelda series.  I would wager that most people who start this game never even come close to finishing it (How some people can say this is their favorite in the series is astounding to me).  I however have played this game twice in preparation for this blog (so you don't have to) and I can safely say that this game is one of the most frustrating gaming experiences I have ever had the misfortune of experiencing.  The game has an extreme level of difficulty, coupled with several unfortunate features that really make this game just plain rage inducing.  The game itself begins on the screen above with absolutely zero explanation as to what is going on, what your motivations are, or even an explanation of who the chick in the bed is.  If you happened to have the original manual for the game (I did not when I first played this and the internet was not yet a thing) then you would know that the woman in the bed is Princess Zelda, put into a deep sleep by an evil Wizard and a power hungry Prince who will stop at nothing to get the Triforce.  Link is charged with saving Zelda and is given 6 crystals which will unlock the doors in the temples and stop Ganon's crew from destroying the world!  So the story exists I suppose, but it certainly does not exist when you play the game.  Any NPC you talk to either tells you that you have to stop Ganon or rescue Zelda, not all that much in terms of actual story.

Upon exiting the first area  there's a moment (albeit a short one) when you think that the game might actually be ok.

There's a clearly mark path (maybe you go that way!), some trees, water, and mountains!  Look at all the places immediately available to you!  However, moments later as you begin walking it all goes horribly wrong.  The image on the right shows how battles in this game work.  As you are walking in the overworld, black sprites will randomly start moving around causing you to enter a battle screen (of sorts) when you run into them.

During these battles Link earns experience points, based on which enemies he kills, that increase either your attack power, hearts, or magic.  Now, this would be a cool system if you could control which stats get increased at what time, but alas, you cannot.  That's how so many things in this game work, they seem like initially cool ideas but they tend to fall flat on their face.  The image below shows a very typical battle screen, containing weaker and stronger enemies.  As you continue along in the game, the amount of experience you earn from each enemy barely increases (max you can get from any enemy is 50 points), while the amount of experience needed to gain a level goes up by over 500 points each time (maxing out at 9000).

  This leveling up system turns combat into a completely boring grind as you continually fight the same enemies over and over again, gaining little to often zero experience from enemies (only the first three or four stronger enemies on each screen give you experience).  Because this game is difficult, you can never just go through the game normally and hope to level up along the way.  Unlike most modern RPG's, you do not keep your experience points in this game when you get a game over.  So to actually level up in this game you have to find an area close to a town and fight the same enemies over and over; heading to the town to heal every ten minutes or so.  To make this whole process that much more difficult, the hit box for Link's sword is so small that unless you swing at the exact moment, you will miss and get hit by the enemy you were trying to kill.  This all wouldn't be so bad if you had a decent amount of health, but of course you don't.  Your life bar increases amazingly slowly as it has to wait for three more level gains before it can go up again.  So during the initial parts (the entire game really) you are constantly struggling to make progress due to lack of health and lack of magic to heal yourself.  All of this is further ruined by the fact that you only get three lives.  Once you lose that third life, this screen pops up:

Prepare to see this screen over and over again.  Because you will die over and over and over and over again.  When you die you (thankfully) get to keep the spells you have earned however you start off back at the opening screen with sleeping Zelda.  You literally have to backtrack over and over again, hoping against all hope you won't die en route (and trust me you will) so that just maybe you can advance further in the game (Eventually you can break some rocks and make the back tracking A BIT less tedious, but it's actually really easy to miss the spell that let's you do this.  Trust me, I didn't get it my first play through).  None of this is helped by the fact that as you make your way across the map you will encounter several towns along the way, all of which have a Wizard of some kind that teaches you a spell.  These spells are often useless beyond getting past a certain section of the map or killing one specific enemy.  My least favorite of them all is the "Jump" spell, whose literal only use is to allow Link to jump up to one ledge inside one cave in order to advance further in the game.   It's the same story for most of the other spells as well.  Good luck trying to figure out how to get the spells in the first place though, as each town, apart from the background color and the color of the houses, is completely indistinguishable from the one before it; as if that wasn't bad enough all of the NPC's are one of six different sprites.

I really could go on and on about how piss poor this game is.  I could tell you about each dungeon and how the puzzles, when they do come around, amount to nothing more than touch this thing and find where to go next.  The bosses are all either way too easy or way too hard and honestly, even getting to each boss is an accomplishment in and of itself.  Best of all, after all that work you put in, after all those enemies you painstakingly killed, after finding a few 50 experience point bags (enemies will occasionally drop these), you arrive at the boss of each temple for the first time and it it kills you (not once during this game was I able to beat a boss on the first try) which sends you back to the beginning again, all experience points obtained for that level will be lost.  Worst though of all of these things, Nintendo both created and shamed one of the most iconic names in the Zelda Universe: Dark Link.

This is the final boss of Adventure of Link.  After you get through the final dungeon, after you beat what you thought was the final boss, you arrive at Dark Link.  For those of you that remember the epic battle between Link and Dark Link in Ocarina of Time (many people's first experience with the character) , this fight will disappoint you to no end.  There are two ways to enter into this fight: you can go at it the traditional way, hoping that you can land some hits while you jump and swing your sword (highly unlikely considering you will probably have very little health/lives left) OR you can do what I'm sure 95% of people who beat this game have done (Link to Dark Link fight easy completion).   This game is an exercise in mediocrity and can be described as nothing short of self-mutilation.  Maybe this game was ahead of its time, maybe it had great ideas but poor execution, maybe......honestly I can't talk about this game anymore, it makes me sick.  Play it if you really want to but I have to recommend you play on the 3DS with save states.  Normally, I would completely deplore this kind of action when playing any video game but really, the game is zero fun without them and trust me, even with the ability to reload save states you will still die and gamble and make sacrifices.  This game is brutal, awful, and a pock mark on the Zelda series.  Even Miyamoto came out recently and said that this game was his most disappointing ever.  When Miyamoto says that, something about this game is horribly horribly wrong.

I am glad to say that this is the only Zelda game out of all 16 of them that I truly do not enjoy playing.  I wish that maybe they could take the same ideas and remake it into a semi-modern experience, but honestly I don't think anything can fix all of the problems this game has.  Thanks for reading!  Come back tomorrow and find out which is #15!